I've Decided I'm Feeling Calmer And More Charitable.

Perhaps even a little bit more sober.

So I should probably tell the fuller, truer version of that anecdote.

https://twitterwithbraincells.blogspot.com/2023/02/i-maintain-that-it-was-absolutely-vital.html

It turns out that if you watch a football match on TV. Even the highlights at the end of a news bulletin. It's because someone from the world of TV/Movies has come along and filmed that football match.

This is normally a camera operator and a scaffolder. A; "Rigger" as they tend to be described in TV and movie credits. They usually turn up in their own satellite uplink van. As with in the construction industry they tend to be self-employed contractors.

The ones I used to work with the most were contracted by the ITV network's local news. Their evening news bulletin often used to feature celebrity guests. Trying to promote their latest song, TV show, movie etc.

Part of this guy's job was fitting all guests with a microphone. Which is clipped to the top of their shirt, near their neck/mouth. With a cable running to a power/transmitter pack around their waist. Men in shirts and pants are a lot easier to mic up than women in form fitting dresses.

A similar show is the BBC network's magazine; "The One Show." In March 2022 US popstar Camila Cabello appeared on The One Show. In an effort to look/feel sexy she wasn't wearing a bra beneath her flimsy top. So ended up exposing her breasts to everyone. At around 7pm.

This guy once had a similar incident with a young female popstar(s). I genuinely can't remember who. Although I suspect it might have been All Saints. The great rivals of the Spice Girls.

In an effort to look/feel sexy this woman wasn't wearing a bra beneath her flimsy top. So as he was fitting her mic. He not only got a really good look at her breasts. He also brushed up against them.

Far from being a terrible letch. I think this left him feeling more embarrassed about it than she was. Sadly. I know there are plenty who wouldn't feel at all ashamed.

A big part of security work is body searches. Pat-downs. Ideally men search men while women search women.

However the really casual violence that requires security staff makes it a hostile working environment for everyone. As with the military and construction industry the macho bravado and casual misogyny makes it a particularly hostile working environment for women.

When the numbers just don't add up. There is no option other than to have men patting-down women.

It is an old trick of football hooligans. That a gang of, say, 15 men will bring one woman with them. That woman's bra and underwear with be stuffed with razor and Stanley knife/boxcutter blades.

So in doing pat-downs you really have to get in there and have a good feel. Of both a strange woman's breasts and crotch.

Not in an; "Ooh! This is sexy." way. In a; "I don't want to be the reason one of my mates ends up getting his throat cut." way.

Normally while you're doing this. You'll have the woman's 'boyfriend,' his 'brothers' and her 'brothers' all screaming at you. For sexually assaulting her. Not because they're worried about her. They want to use the weapons she's carrying on you later.

So I think this guy's embarrassment at accidentally touching this popstar's naked breasts, without her permission. Was only compounded by having to admit to us. That he felt embarrassed having touched a woman's breasts in the course of his work.

So as a defence mechanism. He made up this big macho, bravado laden story about how much he'd enjoyed doing it.

It then stuck. So every time he turned up to work after that. He had to face being greeted 200+ times with the words;

"Alright C'nt (a culturally appropriate colloquial greeting). What have you groped this week(?!)"

Honestly. I think that if one day he did turn up in a mini-skirt and boobtube. We'd probably have let him off. 

Of course I did watch *that* episode of The One Show. While cooking/eating dinner. I was paying so much attention I didn't even notice Camilla Cabello. Let alone her breasts. Only reading about it many hours later.

It was the very next day that Dolly Parton forced herself onto The One Show. Clearly convinced it was really, really important to me.